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The Real Resolutions

Sure, I have some grand scale ridiculous desires about stuff to accomplish this year. Like reading the Bible a few times and finishing this gargantuan and barely begun project from last year (yeah, now you know). But I dare not call such things real resolutions. Here are some of the things I have actually resolved to do this year:

  • Be in Munich for Oktoberfest.
  • Read a book on the history of pirates.
  • Spit-roast an entire pig this summer.
  • Re-read at least two books that deserve it.
  • Hit at least two Roger Clyne shows this year.
  • Listen to more music.

If I do all of these things this year I’ll be pretty happy.


  1. Ah, your one aspiration brings back old memories: I used to have a BBQ business where I cooked whole pigs on a spit over hardwood. We used an old 200 gallon drum cut in half, with a big chrome spit hooked to an old electric motor that rotated the beast once every 9 seconds. We used to leave the skin on, but score it with a knife, then cover it with a mix of salt, celery salt, a little garlic and a hint of pepper–which would then become a decadent crust at the end. I also used to stuff the belly with sausage and then wire it shut, letting them back inside for the duration. MmmmMmmm. I miss that. I hope you get to enjoy it some time soon–and save some for me.

    Tuesday, January 12, 2010 at 4:24 pm | Permalink
  2. Auggie Webster wrote:

    All noble goals, especially the pig. I and a friend once “accidentally” ripped the front leg off a spit-roasted pig while tailgating at a WVU game and then forced to eat all of it by my host. Puked. Ate some more. Second best day of my life.

    So Halden, which side are you on? Team Conan or Team Jay Milhous Leno?

    Tuesday, January 12, 2010 at 4:32 pm | Permalink
  3. Halden wrote:

    Well, I think the only thing I watch on NBC anymore is 30 Rock, so…Conan?

    Tuesday, January 12, 2010 at 4:37 pm | Permalink
  4. roger flyer wrote:

    Drink Surly with Roger and Ry and Burly Coffee with same in Minnesota…

    Tuesday, January 12, 2010 at 5:26 pm | Permalink
  5. You should come to Milwaukee for our Octoberfest celebrations. We aren’t exactly Germany, but we do have a damn good time with all the German influence.

    Tuesday, January 12, 2010 at 5:49 pm | Permalink
  6. Halden wrote:

    Ok, two things. 1. I’m going to Munich because my Dad and I are already planning a trip to Europe in September. 2. I’m certainly not going to some other part of the States for the purpose of drinking beer. Come on you, you guys. Not that I don’t think you’re each super cool and all. But I live in Portland.

    Tuesday, January 12, 2010 at 5:54 pm | Permalink
  7. dan wrote:

    I started reading Barth’s CD four years ago… and am now on Volume III.1. Yep. I’m happy if I get through a volume a year.

    Tuesday, January 12, 2010 at 6:09 pm | Permalink
  8. Bobby Grow wrote:

    That makes me feel better about my Dogmatics reading too :-). I like your goal to read through the Bible a few times, as a Roman Catholic told me once: “You can never go wrong with the Bible!” And your trip to the “Fatherland” sounds fun, eat a pretzel and drive porsche for me :-)! And I can’t eat pig anymore (I’m going alkaline) . . . enjoy!

    Tuesday, January 12, 2010 at 7:11 pm | Permalink
  9. myles wrote:

    Always Conan. He’s funnier than Leno ever was.

    Wednesday, January 13, 2010 at 5:57 am | Permalink
  10. Charlie Collier wrote:

    You need to do the pig and the spit thing down here in Eugene. How about for the 4th of July gig at the Ark?

    Wednesday, January 13, 2010 at 9:53 am | Permalink
  11. Halden wrote:

    Actually there’s a strong possibility that it will be in Eugene, though I’m not sure for what event. I’ll keep you posted. Me and Kerry are scheming about it.

    Wednesday, January 13, 2010 at 10:05 am | Permalink
  12. Halden wrote:

    I know this is late, but it gives me great joy to know that you once owned a BBQ business. Well done, sir.

    Wednesday, January 13, 2010 at 3:59 pm | Permalink

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